Srinagar: Expressing deep frustration over the sheer inefficiency of his morning commute, local 34-year-old Insaan Bhat flatly refused to board a Tata Sumo at the Batamaloo bus stand today upon realizing the vehicle contained absolutely no women.
Witnesses reported that the man had been waiting at the stand for approximately half an hour when a Sumo arrived. He approached the vehicle, looked inside, and carefully examined its passengers before walking away. Witnesses added that Bhat has done this several times, letting 14 perfectly good Sumos pass because they contained no women, which, according to him, “ruined his morning.”
Talking to our reporter, Bhat said that he was “devastated by the ingenuity of women who play this game with him every now and then.” Known for his clever antics, the 34-year-old reportedly spends a considerable amount of time identifying vehicles in which he believes his chances of finding a woman he could sit next to are highest.
His favourite hours, he explained in detail to our reporter, are “the morning and the evening, because that’s when university and college girls travel.” Commenting on today’s failure, he defeatedly said that “ app based services like Grabito and electric auto services are a big threat to the bus industry, which in turn affects his daily routine.”
One of the drivers, who has witnessed this mastermind at his best behavior, told our reporter that Insaan has developed a calculated routine for identifying what he calls a “promising” Sumo. The driver was so far happy with Insaan, given that he seldom nudged him about fare hikes and overcrowding. Furthermore, the driver said reassuringly that Insaan “loved overcrowding” as long as he sat next to a woman whom he could take advantage of.
According to sources familiar with his methods, Bhat meticulously scans the middle and back rows, calculating the exact trajectory of sharp turns on the “so-called smart city’s potholes and traffic jams” to maximize his chances of unwanted physical contact.
Despite the physical toll of waiting for hours, Bhat remains determined in his daily mission. He later confirmed to our reporter that he is currently jobless and has absolutely nowhere to go but feels it is highly important to maintain a strict morning routine, which “otherwise would feel like a complete personal failure.”
Local Man Refuses to Board Tata Sumo Because There Are No Women Inside
A local man’s strict requirement for a vehicle with female passengers has left him stranded at the Batamaloo taxi stand for over an hour. He has publicly condemned the growing ingenuity of women who continue to ruin his morning commute.
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